My 4yo (aka the tiny terrorist) after appearing in our room for the 187th time tonight and screaming bloody murder at 10:15pm for no reason ⬇️
4yo: “but I love your bed. your bed is the best”
Husband: “it is the best. thanks for the compliment. go to bed”
Me: “our bed is for grown ups only”
4yo: “but….. daddy sleeps in here?????!!”
Touché small person. Touché.
Do you ever just stop?
Stop the stressing and planning and organizing and cleaning and running and… just stop to look at your kids? To truly embrace their unfiltered innocence and laugh with them? And I don’t mean a giggle. I mean the real kind of laugh. The kind that you feel deep in your gut.
Forget that your hair is a mess and your face is bare. Forget that your wrinkles are loud and proud and the unflattering angles. Forget everything except the laughter.
There is nothing more beautiful than a mom willing to stop and belly laugh with her kids. Because she is showing them that no matter what, they are her joy. They are her peace.
Stop and let yourself laugh. I promise you your kids are funny.
Calling all moms:
Ok let’s have a moment of real talk. Showers are everything. They are basically a mini spa escape and only legitimate, albeit sad, excuse for “me-time.” Assuming of course you aren’t interrupted by a demanding toddler needing his sippy cup refilled. Or a second grader who chooses to use the toilet directly in front of your shower while you’re in it instead of one of the other 2 toilets in the house 😑
If you’re anything like me, you take longer-than-necessary showers for no other reason than the ability to breathe without people crawling all over you. And don’t act like you don’t sit there and read the back of your shampoo bottle. You do. We all do. Even if you’ve read it 1,000 times before, you know you’re trying to translate the other languages even though you have no idea how.
For me, conditioner is life. I have super coarse hair and I’ve tried them all. So of course, conditioner is my reading material of choice. At the salon the last time I was there, I decided to try a new deep conditioner. It works well, I like it. But that’s not the point. Girl shut the front door if I didn’t find my conditioner spirit animal whilst I was carousing the back of this bottle tonight.
You guys… read this! “or longer if you fancy.” If you fancy?! 😂😂 I can’t. I mean… I don’t even care much about the conditioner itself but this brand just made me a believer for life for no other reason than adding entertainment to the reading they know all moms are doing in the shower.
Morale of the story: keep reading random crap. Sometimes funny snippets are hidden.
Side note: I love my salon and adore the girl who does my hair. So if you live nearby, Ashley at Elle Salon in Elgin, IL is bomb. And also sells funny conditioner 👏🏼👏🏼
To my baby boy on your 4thBirthday,
You have added more joy and laughter to my life than I can even put into words. You brought the missing piece to my life I didn’t even know I needed. The final puzzle piece that completed our beautiful family. You will always and forever be our “bonus baby.”
When I found out I was pregnant with you, I was terrified. We already had twin 3 year old boys we had gone through every fertility treatment in the world for over 4 years to be blessed with and then you… you surprised us. I’m a planner. I like to know how and why and when and where. You were unexpected and I was unprepared for the unknown. Little did I know the fulfilment you would add to my world. My littlest person, my best friend, my partner in crime. You, Landon Cade, you have completed my world.
You are the perfect combination of your daddy and me. Your ornery nature and unpredictable personality is perfectly congruent with the way you came into this world. You are so wonderfully entertaining and love to make people laugh. You thrive off the reactions of others. You have the ability to immediately shift the energy in any room. You love your big brothers and are determined to do everything they do. Only bigger, and faster, and louder and with more zest.
You love yogurt, peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, pickles and all things chocolate and candy. You can already write your name, sing the alphabet forwards and backwards, and remember all the lyrics to every Twenty One Pilots and Taylor Swift song you’ve ever heard (thanks daddy). You could play trucks, turtles, power rangers and superheroes for hours and know the backstory to every Avengers character ever created. You are wise far beyond your years and remember everything. Literally….all the things. You can repeat something verbatim you heard 3 months ago in passing at the supermarket or when mommy accidentally stepped on one of your Legos you left on the stairs and used a grown up word. You always remember that.
You have the innate ability to convince people to do anything you want them to do and accomplish anything you set your mind to. It’s a rare gift and it will take you far in life. I have no doubt you will be successful because you were meant to do incredible things.
As I say goodbye to my toddler and hello to my beautiful little preschooler, I will embrace your request for “one more story,” “one more song,” and telling me “one more very important thing” as you show up beside my side of the bed for the 456thtime because I know any day could be the last. Give me all the cuddles before you become too cool for them.
I love you more than the sun, more than the moon and more than all the stars in the sky. No matter how big you get, no matter how old you grow, as long as I’m living, my baby you’ll be.
Don’t ever let anyone dull your sparkle sweet boy. You are going to change the world.
Love,
Mommy
(Your birthday is actually Monday but you’ll be out of town so today, today we celebrate YOU my sweet boy!)
Here’s the thing. You don’t need me to carry you anymore. You don’t need me to hold you. You don’t need me to wrap you in a towel, dry you off, snuggle you up and walk you to your room to get your pjs after your bath. You don’t need me to inhale your freshly cleaned hair. You don’t need me to awkwardly walk with your body that’s now half the length of mine tangled in my limbs. I know that. I know you don’t need that anymore. But I need it.
So until you’re done asking, which I know could happen any day, I will continue the same routine we started nearly 4 years ago and pretend it’s for you. Because sometimes mamas can secretly need it too.
Ever have one of those parenting moments when your kid makes you feel about 2 inches tall?
This weekend while headed to the movies with our boys, Braylon said unprompted from the backseat:
“Guys I really don’t think we should be taking our own candy into the theater. It’s like we’re sneaking it in and I don’t think it’s right…”
My husband and I simultaneously fumbling over our answer while quietly belly laughing :
“We, uhhh…errrr… I mean… we paid for it at the store and ummm….it’s uhhhh… we’re paying for the tickets to the movie and buying drinks and popcorn so I ummm….ehhhh…. 👈🏼 you get the point.
Thanks for keeping us honest Bray 😂👏🏼
So yeah, anyone looking for parenting advice, clearly we’re on top of things over here 😆🙌🏼💥
Dear Whoever came up with the 5:15 weeknight start time of 1st grade baseball games,
It’s cool. We’ll throw them lunchables in the backseat of the car while frantically scrambling to find the inevitable missing glove, hat, helmet, bat or sock. Don’t even get me started on trying to successfully shove baseball cleats on their feet. I’m convinced those things were made 3 sizes too small on purpose. Then let’s make the game go a full 5-6 innings (i.e. 5-6 hours in elementary school time). I mean…a mom can only convincingly tell her screaming toddler that the playground across the parking lot is “closed” so many times before he starts to become suspect. Also, let’s make the games 3x a week… that’ll be fun. Don’t mind me, I’ll just be sitting here in my work clothes shoving fast food into my face, answering work emails while simultaneously cheering for my little ball players because I refuse to not be present. Can we like, just consider a weekend game? Or simmer down on the requirement of getting to the game 30 minutes early? It’s cool. We’ve got this.
Sincerely,
Every working parent in the world
Landon in the car this morning:
“Everyone in the world is the best. I just love people. They are all the best. Except for you, and my dad, and God, and Spider-Man…. you are all better than the best, you’re pretty fantastic.”
And so basically if you don’t start your day with the positivity of a 3 year old, re-check your heart and start again ♥️
Ps… Cory, I can’t believe we’ve on the same level as Spider-Man and God.
Backstory:
I’m pretty sick today. And not like man-cold sick. The kind that has my eyes half glazed over, 900 number raspy-esque voice, wishing someone would slice slits into my face to drain my sinuses and relieve the 600lb pressure.
I’m fine. It’s fine. We’re fine.
Still trying to be present with my family laying on the couch because I was gone this weekend, worked all day, and I love them.
Actual Story:
Cory (joking): “Just go take some NyQuil and try to get some sleep you’re dragging us all down.”
☝🏼please note the last word he used was DOWN. d.o.w.n.
That is not the word my kids heard.
Braxton (looking up from his iPad in shock at what his dad just said):
“MOMS DRAGGING US ALL TO HELL?!?? WHAT?!”
Braylon: “MOMMY WHY WOULD YOU DRAG US ALL TO HELL?!?!?”
Landon: “WE’RE GOING TO HELL? Can Lucy come?” 👈🏼 Lucy is our dog.
• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
Morale of the story: be nice to your sick wife. And don’t make dumb dad jokes with a bunch of boys in the room who have mastered the art of the half-listen.
Allow me to preface this with the fact that all children are created with different talents, gifts, passions and abilities. Here’s another fun fact…. that also applies to twins.
We have 8 year old (in a few weeks) twin sons. One of them is an absolute physical beast of a child. He is an athlete by every definition, has a body made of essentially 99% muscle with thighs the size of tree trunks and excels at every sport he ever tries. We will call him Twin A. Twin B is much more petite. He is small but has a mighty, powerful mind. He is inquisitive and loves art and books and asks a thousand questions about everything.
That being said, at this age, we encourage them both to try everything that may interest them so they can develop and learn what they love and want to pursue in the future. Try all “the things” because who knows what you’ll enjoy. That’s our philosophy.
Right now, “the thing” is baseball. Coach pitch baseball. They both wanted to try it. Quietly my husband and I both knew Twin A would excel. As a twin parent (or any parent), there are few things more difficult than watching one child excel while the other struggles hard. But you continue to encourage and to cheer because that’s. what. you. do.
Twin A…. hits the ball every time. He’s getting better. He bats 4th, he is fast and his teammates cheer his name and celebrate him often. Twin B…. strikes out every time. 8 games, he has had one hit and it was accidental. His teammates don’t get excited when he comes up to bat or cheer because they assume he’ll strike out.
But listen carefully to this… he never, ever gives up. Never. He goes up to bat every time with confidence believing in himself. I love it so much.
You guys!!!! Here I sit 2 states away on my lunch break at a conference and I get a video from my husband of this beautiful boy getting his first hit and successfully making it to first base… his teammates cheering his name in the background.
I don’t know if it’s because I’m at this conference that is about never giving up on your goals or just because he finally got the hit but I am BEAMING with pride over here.
Those of you thinking about giving up, on anything, watch this. And then stop it.
You go Braxy! You did the dang thing!! Mommy is so proud of you and you are a rockstar.
MOMMING ALL THE BOYS 